Roger Goodell

Roger Goodell is dumb. Do not forget that.

Never Forget That Roger Goodell Is a Dumb Human

September 07, 2016 / by / 3 Comments

It has been a relatively quiet off-season for NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, in the sense that this summer he failed to make a public spectacle of his own nincompoopery by, say, convening a kangaroo court to suspend one of the league’s most visible stars for a scientifically implausible equipment modification, or by convening that same kangaroo court to investigate something that’s actually bad but repeatedly tripping over his own dick in the process.

Taking a deep dive into what will surely be the best 17 weeks of post-Super Bowl 2016.

15 Takeaways from the 2016 NFL Regular Season Schedule

April 15, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

Last night, the NFL released the schedule for the 2016 regular season, which somehow managed to make September seem simultaneously closer than ever and infinitely distant.

The daily routines of 8 of the most famous people in football

The Daily Routines of Famous Football Personalities

April 05, 2016 / by , , , , / 0 Comment

Ever wonder what the keys to success are for your favorite athletes? After months of painstaking research, National Ave has uncovered the daily routines of some of the most important personalities in football:

Our guide to the gambling bacchanal of the Super Bowl, complete with every prop bet you'll ever need.

The only Super Bowl betting guide you’ll ever need

February 06, 2016 / by , , / 1 Comment

Super Bowl 50 is almost here, which means that along with a veritable bacchanal of media frenzy, ritualistic violence, and Phil Simms crimes against the English language, we also get to gamble on just about every aspect of the game.


Roger Goodell vs. Jabba the Hutt: Who’s the Better Commissioner?

January 27, 2016 / by , / 1 Comment

As the National Football League continues to fall under scrutiny for a litany of wrongdoings, ranging from player safety concerns to player-wife-or-girlfriend safety concerns, Roger Goodell’s standing with football fans has become ever more contentious. Many have suggested his direct involvement in the mishandling of the NFL’s many controversies since the beginning of his tenure, and even more believe he is a detriment to the sport.

Welcome to a new season's wasteland of amorality

Why the NFL Season and True Detective are mostly the same thing

August 16, 2015 / by / 2 Comments

The old adage goes: “When a door closes, a window opens.” This is true in many things, but none more so than in last week’s television programming.

The similarities between the NFL and Game of Thrones are endless, so here's part 2 in our list of what NFL player just about every character in the series most resembles.

If Every Major “Game of Thrones” Character Was An NFL Player: The Stars

May 16, 2015 / by , , , , / 7 Comments

Violence. Intrigue. Morally questionable leadership. A male-dominated world where life comes cheap and delusions of grandeur blind all involved to the rotting aspects that are festering away within the game. The similarities between the NFL and Game of Thrones are endless, so here’s part 2 in our list of what NFL player just about every character in the series most resembles:

Steve Marcus / Reuters

What Is Dead May Never Die

May 03, 2015 / by / 1 Comment

Last Saturday was supposed to be the greatest day in sports.


Why NFL Fans Should Be Excited about the Second Coming of Tebow

March 10, 2015 / by / 3 Comments

Tim Tebow, praise be his name, is (probably) returning to the NFL – and you should be excited about it, Tebowdamnit!

4 key changes the NFL should make in order to reduce the suckiness of the Pro Bowl

4 Ways to Make the Pro Bowl Suck Less

January 04, 2015 / by / 1 Comment

The Pro Bowl is definitely the worst all-star game of any professional sport. The NBA All-Star Game is a beautiful tribute to all of the crazy shit NBA players wish they could do in games. The NHL All-Star game has similar displays of ridiculous, plus they get extra special bonus points for being the first league to use the kickball draft system.