The Search for Andrew Luck’s Doppelganger Ends Here

October 07, 2014 / by / 13 Comments

It’s hard to deny that Andrew Luck is a pretty distinctive fellow in appearance.

 

Some people say he looks like a “troll.” Some people say he looks like a “cave troll.” Some people say he looks like a “mountain troll.” Hell, some people say he looks like a 16-year-old who accidentally popped a woody at the DMV right before taking his driver’s license pic.

However, we were not to be satisfied with such nonspecific descriptions of Andrew Luck. Nay, we set out to find his true doppelganger. It wasn’t a particularly easy task.

At first, we thought it might be Confederate Lieutenant General Jubal Early.

This one turned out to be insufficient. Luck’s beard is neckier, while Early’s forehead is Peyton-ier. This wasn’t the match we wanted.

Of course, we thought. It’s Zach Galifianakis.

Still not close enough. No, someone with a similar beard isn’t even going to cut it. We need some full-on facial recognition, the type Facebook uses to auto-tag me in photos I don’t want any of the 7 billion people in the world to see.

And then the answer shone down, like a brilliant ray of light reflecting off the one skyscraper in Indianapolis. Andrew Luck’s doppelganger has been sitting in front of us all along, nestled in a terrible subplot of a popular TV show.

Our work here is done.