Falcons Kicker Matt Bryant Just Completed An Internship At The Georgia Aquarium?

July 01, 2014 / by / 18 Comments

You’ve probably heard of Matt Bryant, the starting kicker for the Atlanta Falcons. If you’re like me, you might know him as the guy who you thought would be a great fantasy kicker because the Falcons were supposed to not be the most terrible team ever. Anyway, the official Atlanta Falcons twitter account informed us today that Bryant spent his off-season doing an internship at the Georgia Aquarium.

The internship was only one day a week, just like his real fucking job.

The first question we must ask is obviously “was this a paid internship?” I mean, I’m sure Matt Bryant gets paid well for being one of the only good players in the Falcons organization, but the guy is going to be 40 next year. 40-year-olds don’t do unpaid internships, right? Right?!

The second question we must ask is “what?” According to the three-minute video the Falcons put together to advertise Bryant’s internship — which, incidentally, is probably the best thing the Falcons have done for the Atlanta community since they came mildly close to winning the Super Bowl in 1999 — Bryant has always been fascinated by sea creatures and shit. But here’s the thing: there’s no way Matt Bryant was the most qualified applicant for this internship. In fact, there is probably a very intelligent Marine Biology major at Emory who got shafted out of this internship because they chose to give it to the man who was kicker for the Falcons during the one season they waited until the playoffs to be a total disappointment to everyone.

Between this and the time the Atlanta Falcons tweeted “Turn Down For What” in reference to a picture of Matt Ryan sleeping…

…I think we can safely say the Atlanta Falcons are just as bad at social media as they are at football.