Hot Takes In Your Area: I Didn’t See It But Mad Max Should Have Won Best Picture
NOTE: Hot Takes In Your Area should be considered satire at all points unless you agree with it in which case it’s totally serious.
People, I am outraged. White America’s answer to the BET Awards came and went last night, culminating in the unconscionable snub of Mad Max: Fury Road for Best Picture. Now, I didn’t see the movie or any of the nominated films but I can tell you one thing: Mad Max should have won Best Picture.
First off, it’s just a really good film I bet. Lots of my friends saw it and let me tell you, they loved it. Like seriously loved it. Everyone says it’s really fast paced and fun and that it keeps your attention the whole time. Those are some qualities I definitely want in my Best Picture winner.
Also, it’s probably really feminist. On the posters there’s a picture of a hot woman, but she isn’t trying to look hot but she also didn’t do that thing she did where she gained weight and got scary looking, so you know it strikes the balance there. I’ve heard people call her a “badass” in the movie too, which is a thing people say about feminists. Feminism is in right now, so the Oscars should have taken note of the cultural zeitgeist but they didn’t because they’re out of touch.
Let’s look at who the Oscars did end up picking: Spotlight. Now obviously I haven’t seen this one either but from what I understand it’s a romcom about a priest and a child. Call me old fashioned, but I just can’t support that kinda film and I am appalled (APPALLED) that the Oscars would award it. And it is particularly outrageous that a film like Spotlight could win in a year when a movie as good as Mad Max probably was up for the same award!
Now don’t worry people, it wasn’t a complete bust. Mad Max swept through the other major awards, picking up trophies for the “Big 6” technical and staging categories. But if anything, that just makes it worse. Clearly the Academy knew how good the movie maybe was, and they chose not to honor it. Who gives a movie Best Sound Mixing but not Best Picture?! A crazy person, that’s who. When I do eventually see the movie, I cannot wait to appreciate how finely the sound is mixed.
So after all this, I think the two things we can all agree on about the Mad Max snub are that 1) you don’t need to see a movie to know it was the best movie of the year, and 2) one of the scary guys with like a gun and mask and shit from the Mad Max trailer should totally go drive his car at the Oscar voters (or whatever it is he does to kill people). That’d show em.