A lyrical analysis of Jason Derulo's hit song "Wiggle"

A Line-By-Line Analysis of Jason Derulo’s “Wiggle”

May 13, 2014 / by / 384 Comments

If you didn’t know, Jason Derulo is having a renaissance right now. No more is Jason Derulo riding solo or picturing getting with ~ladies~ in his head. He’s talking dirty to international superstars and trying to answer the age-old question: how did she fit all that ass in them jeans? My passion for “Wiggle” cannot be understated. Let’s have a look at the inner workings of that sensual, sensitive soulful singer-songwriter’s mind.

“Wiggle”

(feat. Snoop Dogg)

[Snoop Dogg:]

Hey, yo, Jason
Say somethin’ to her
Holla at her

In this teasing intro, we find that Snoop Dogg is also on this track. This is confusing to me because I thought he changed his name to Snoop Lion. Snoop wants Jason to make a move on the fine lady he has his eye on. Regardless of this ensuing flirtation, I’m into the potential bromance. Snooprulo?

I got one question
How do you fit all that in them jeans?
[Laughs]

You know what to do with that big fat butt

JASON SPEAKS. Picture this: Jason Derulo sidles up to you in a club. He’s probably wearing a fedora, but no shirt.   He giggles nervously, and then whispers this tantalizing question into your ear. Panty-dropper, amirite? The only caveat is the slight anxiety produced when you realize that, in fact, you do not know what to do with your big fat butt.

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Just a ittle bittle

Oh, thank god he told me what to do. Also, just wanted to emphasize the use of bittle here to rhyme with…wiggle?

ALSO, Jason Derulo’s use of perhaps a choir of morning doves (alternative theories: recorder or whistle) for this track evokes the birds chirping outside of Snow White’s window as she whistles while she works. (Twerks) I have never heard anything more erotic.

Patty cake, Patty cake
With no hands
Got me in this club making wedding plans
If I take pictures while you do your dance
I can make you famous on Instagram

Jason Derulo is playing pattycake with your butt, right now. In the club. An act that is usually reserved for playing with adorable babies, right after a scintillating round of peek-a-boo. How does that make you feel? A little violated?

Just keep doing your dance though and he’ll put that shit on Insta. He’ll probably use the lo-fi filter to really contrast your angles. No need to skinny arm or duck face. Just dance. Maybe if you’re lucky he’ll put it on Snapchat stories too and it will stay there for days.

Hot damn it
Your booty like two planets
Go head, and go ham sammich
Whoa
I can’t stand it

Which two planets? Mercury and Saturn? Because that’s kind of an insult. One tiny cheek, one huge one? One cheek that’s super gassy – looking at you, Jupiter – and one that’s rock hard? I’m going to assume Mars and Earth, two planets similar in both size and composition.  

Cause you know what to do with that big fat butt

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Just a little bit of

JUST A LITTLE BIT OF WHAT THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME.

Cadillac, Cadillac, pop that trunk
Let’s take a shot
Alley oops that dunk
Tired of working that 9 to 5
Oh baby let me come and change your life

Not going to go environmentally sustainable and make it a Prius, JD? I would absolutely love to quit my 9 to 5 #loljobs #lolseniorincollege #lolthisarticlemakesmeunemployable and wiggle for you full time. This is not a joke. Call me. National Ave editors have my contact information.

Hot damn it
Your booty like two planets
Go head, and go ham sammich
Whoa
I can’t stand it
Cause you know what to do with that big fat butt

Go ham sandwich, put some mustard on it, throw it in the Panini machine to get things nice and toasty and then wiggle it.

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
(Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle)
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
(Shake it, shake it girl)
Just a ittle bittle
(Little bit of, little bit of, little bit of, SWING!)

SWING. THAT’S WHAT HE NEEDS A LITLE BIT OF. Thanks for the enlightenment, JD.

[Snoop Dogg:]
Shake what your mama gave you
Misbehave you
I just wanna strip you, dip you, flip you, bubble bathe you
What they do
Taste my rain drops, OK boo
Now what you will, what you want, what you may do
Completely separated, til I deeply penetrate it
Then I take I out, and wipe it off
Eat it, ate it, love it, hate it
Overstated, underrated, everywhere I been can
You wiggle, wiggle for the D, O, double G, again?

TBH smdh at Snoop’s intrusion into our private moment with Jason Derulo. There is no goddamn fucking way that anyone wants to taste Snoop’s rain drops. Further disgusting is the fact that it appears he is going to stick his penis into a butt, wipe it off, and then eat it. Whyyyyyy why why why wWWWHhhhhYYYYYY you tryna break my stride?

I do consent to wiggle for the d-d-double G though because there are also two g’s in wiggle, so such genius, much vocab, wow.

Come on baby
Turn around
(Turn around, turn around, turn around)
You’re a star girl
Take a bow
(Take a bow, take a bow, take a bow)
It’s just one thing that’s killing me

It’s like my entire life has been building to this moment. The music swells. Jason sounds plaintive and my body is ready. What’s one thing that’s killing him? He’s probably going to propose. That’s why he’s bowing, right? He is trying to wife me.

How you get that in them jeans?

Oh.

I don’t know, I like bought a size up from my normal size jeans and since they’re jeggings, they kind of stretch a little even if you’re really well endowed in the derriere.

You know what to do with that big fat butt

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
(Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle)
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
(Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle)
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
(Shake it, shake it girl)
Just a ittle bittle

I think he might have made this song for one of those “they wobble but they don’t fall down” toys that kids used to play with in the 90s after eating their lunchables. Not mad though.

Now make it clap
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Now make it clap
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Make it clap
Now make it clap

One time my mom walked in on me trying to make my ass clap alone in my room and it wasn’t pleasant for either of us.

Damn baby you got a bright future behind you

Omg he made a joke ****swoooooon **flawlesss