The Real World: Ex-Plosion Episode 5 “Ex-Plosion” Recap

February 06, 2014 / by / 15 Comments

An Extreme Shit-Show

Season 5 finally gave us the arrival of the exes - and the best episode of Ex-Plosion yet.

Real World Ex-Plosion Recap
Chapter 5: In Which the Exes Arrive

The face that launched at least two ships.

The face that launched at least two ships.

Finally, after four episodes of the Real World: Ex-Plosion, we are given what we have been promised. The moment when we finally got to see Jenny’s surprise face unfold in real time. The arrival of the exes. What an event.

Episode 5 opened with the roommates discovery of the exes inside the apartment. Initially, their reactions were uniformly positive, as everyone immediately assumed that their roommates were just there temporarily. However, Lauren quickly let Cory know that all the exes are moving in, and that quickly kills everyone’s excitement. It was awesome to see Cory transition from ebullient joy at the idea of having sex and saying good-bye, to sheepish confusion upon fully realizing the situation. The only person who isn’t upset her ex is moving in is Ariel, who is psyched to have “her girl moving in with her.” It’s unsurprising that she’s taking it the best out of anyone, as so far she’s proven to be the most reasonable and controlled character in the season.

Throughout the entire sequence, MTV continues to treat you to second-long shots that show the position of cameras and other “making-of” goodies. If you’ve ever been interested in actually seeing what a show like this looks like while it’s being made, Ex-Plosion can help you out. And even if that’s not your cup of tea, its nice to be constantly reminded of the full context of the scenes for once.

As the exes meet, Cory and Brian, the only two people in the house who are probably using human growth hormone, immediately start sizing each other up for a fight. A confrontation seems likely as it becomes almost immediately apparent that Brian is somehow EVEN WORSE than Cory.

Unfortunately, instead of immediately engaging in meaty fisticuffs, Brian decides to take out his anger on Jenny. Even more unfortunate, it appears that Brian lacks the ability to speak. When I was taking notes on this episode I ended up writing down “Brian cannot speak” five separate times. He is a man that is continually dumbstruck by nothing. However, after he finally manages to piece together a few insulting sentences directed towards Jenny, she basically calls him a poet. Then Brian declares that he’s going to do a box jump onto a high windowsill, succeeds, and grows excited at the prospect of more “challenges” tucked around the house. It was like a scene from Big if Tom Hanks was from the Jersey Shore.

Moments after the reunion. Moments before shower-sex.

Moments after the reunion. Moments before shower-sex.

Cory wastes no time and pretty much goes straight to having sex with Lauren in the shower. At this point it seems that Cory only has sex in the shower or in a wolf-suit. They live in a tiny house, so of course Jenny catches them playing genital-tag and severs ties with Cory to go back to Brian. After this, Cory has a pretty limited role on the show, and basically just concentrates his time on figuring out how to tell Lauren that he wants to have sex with her, but also anyone else in the world that he might meet.

Finally Cory shows a surprising amount of maturity and talks to Brian about the issue. They almost fight (obviously) but manage to keep it together just enough to come to an understanding.

Jenny and Brian immediately after Jenny announces she wants to have his babies.

Jenny and Brian immediately after Jenny announces she wants to have his babies.

The whole Jenny-Brian thing  wraps up with a moment where Jenny tells Brian she wants to have his babies, and makes Brian cry with the raw power of her love. Its impossible to not know that they’re going to tear each other apart.

Meanwhile, Jamie continues to be super obsessive of Tom, and Tom’s surprisingly cute ex, Hailey, vindicates this fear by expressing an inexplicable desire to get back together with everyone’s least favorite fratstar. Tom continues to handle this in a way that suggests to me that he is a 16-year-old boy with a self-prescribed “sensitive soul” that has somehow tricked MTV into letting him onto a television show.

"You've got a way better ass than her."

After loudly declaring that he will probably leave her, Tom reassures Jamie that she “has a better ass than [Hailey].”

But really, things just fall apart for Hailey pretty fast. Even when he’s standing by Jamie, he makes it pretty clear how thin his loyalties are. While he’s out at the club (which is basically a Colosseum this season, in terms of providing consistent conflict) he loudly tells Hailey that he basically wants to date her after the show. Then tells Jamie to ignore it and that she has a “better ass” than Hailey. It was fascinating to watch a man shoot himself in both feet.


Over the course of the episode, Tom expresses continually how difficult the situation is to Hailey, and slowly comes to the realization that he should break up with Jamie. At the end of the episode he just

Tom explaining how he hates relationships. Especially ones that get in the way of his relationship with Hailey.

Tom explaining how he hates relationships. Especially ones that get in the way of his relationship with Hailey.

breaks up with Jamie in the middle of a group outing as Hailey looks on and beams. Then they cut to credits. I can’t even imagine how Jamie is going to handle this betrayal. But I bet she will be annoying about it.

You hardly see any of Jay, Jenna, Ariel, or Ashley this episode. I think its probably pretty hard to compete for camera time with the other dysfunctional relationships on this show.

The show is now off the air for a week, and returns Wednesday, Febuary 19th at 10/9 central time. The mid-season teaser reveals that the show is headed towards fights, break-ups, and even a pregnancy. Don’t get left behind, right now you can still watch the whole season for free here.

Highlights of this episode

-Hailey and Lauren unknowingly directing their own scene from within the club bathroom. After talking shit they realize that MTV is recording them, and declares they won’t show it. That is, unless they would “just do a shot of the bathroom door” and “put subtitles on it.” MTV then proceeds to take their advice. Seeing characters on a reality TV show describe the format they will later be shown through is pretty indescribable.

-Jamie stepping in street vomit

-How Brian refuses to say he has “feelings,” instead hesitating and substituting “emotions.” (I think he thinks it’s manlier.)