A Love Letter To Each And Every One Of The Chicago Cubs

November 03, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

Dear Joe Maddon: I love you. I love your hippie van and your hipster glasses.

READ MORE
How Kobe Bryant, Tim Duncan, and Kevin Garnett are spending their lives after basketball

National Ave Exclusive: A Day in the Life of Kobe, Duncan, and KG

October 04, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

While the Golden State Warriors pulled one of the greatest free agency heists of all time this summer, they choked away the headlines to the loss of 3 generational talents: Kobe Bryant, Tim Duncan, and Kevin Garnett.

READ MORE
Roger Goodell is dumb. Do not forget that.

Never Forget That Roger Goodell Is a Dumb Human

September 07, 2016 / by / 1 Comment

It has been a relatively quiet off-season for NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, in the sense that this summer he failed to make a public spectacle of his own nincompoopery by, say, convening a kangaroo court to suspend one of the league’s most visible stars for a scientifically implausible equipment modification, or by convening that same kangaroo court to investigate something that’s actually bad but repeatedly tripping over his own dick in the process.

READ MORE

25 Fantasy Football Team Names To Use If Your Boss Joins Your Office League

September 07, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

Fantasy football is, by nature, a hobby characterized by unrelenting shit-talk and a general welcoming of all things inappropriate.

READ MORE

An Oral History of Trevor Siemian’s College Career

August 30, 2016 / by / 1 Comment

Trevor Siemian shocked the world this week by winning the Denver Broncos’ starting quarterback job.

READ MORE
Here are seven names that are infinitely better than 'Guaranteed Rate Field'

7 Names For Sox Park That Would Be Less Terrible Than Guaranteed Rate Field

August 25, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

The White Sox announced yesterday that starting at the end of the season, US Cellular Field will be renamed… Guaranteed Rate Field.

READ MORE

Von Miller Might Not Know His Teammate’s First Name

August 24, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

In an interview yesterday with ESPN’s Lindsay Czarniak, Von Miller claimed that the Denver Broncos have the “best secondary in the National Football League.” He then listed players in the secondary:

READ MORE

Let us joyfully celebrate the 1-year anniversary of Marco Rubio beaning a toddler in the head with a football

August 18, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

It’s hard to put into words how strange the 2016 election season has been.

READ MORE

QUIZ: Cleveland Browns Starting Quarterback Since 1999, or Signer of the Declaration of Independence?

August 04, 2016 / by / 0 Comment

Even the most knowledgeable don’t know the names of every signer of the Declaration of Independence, and even the biggest football fans can’t name every poor bastard who has had to start a game for the Cleveland Browns since 1999. How well will you do?

READ MORE
Speculating the plot and characters of LeBron James and Justin Lin's upcoming Space Jam 2

This is how the LeBron James ‘Space Jam’ sequel should go down

May 03, 2016 / by , / 0 Comment

Space Jam is getting a sequel, with LeBron James once again teaming up with a squad of stars whose career primes occurred long ago in an attempt at intergalactic basketball dominance.

READ MORE